Wow. Beautiful.
In the multitudes of experiences, one must experience heaven and hell. Where one sets one's beliefs in unmoving stone, that is one's faith. And mine is set in love, in companionship, in living. And music, beauty, words, smiles, laughter, magic and coffee.
About Me
- Xavier
- Youth. Self Proclaimed (or maybe just a lofty fantasy) global citizen. Idealist. Wants to change the world. Thus crazy like hell. Has issues with sloth! (how am i supposed to change the world now?) Dreamer and wanderer
Saturday, October 27, 2012
“Make it a habit to ask yourself: What’s going on inside me at this moment? That question will point you in the right direction. But don’t analyze, just watch. Focus your attention within. Feel the energy of the emotion. If there is no emotion present, take your attention more deeply into the inner energy field of your body. It is the doorway into Being.”
- Eckhart Tolle -
Friend
A friend is:
a) one who knows us, but loves us anyway
b) one who knows us not, but loves us anyway too.
a) one who knows us, but loves us anyway
b) one who knows us not, but loves us anyway too.
Thursday, October 25, 2012
Take A Plunge
You can't feel the depth of a lake
without diving down
headfirst
into
it.
Then the pain.
And the possibility of Death.
Sure, many would not understand.
More would only mock at you.
But,
upon rising
back to the surface,
none can appreciate all you've seen
the Depth, the Beauty-unseen & the Beauty-seen-yet-unseen
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
I blew it up
Every change which I have prided in myself over the past 2 months...
So hard to keep in touch with them when I am with you...
I seem to shrink back to how I used to be, with just a phantom memory of how I am at the present.
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
The Past 2 Months
Heh, a part of me wished I could tell you how horrible it has been.
But no. In actuality, I really have to say, life has been better since we went our ways, that I'm better off alone, at least, better off than we were.
Sure, many times it really felt horrible, losing you. Oh no, I didn't lose you, I threw you away. Yes I did. And I am sorry.
We've grown, though, from me throwing you away. Our eyes opened, and now, I feel unsure, and it seems, that you do as well, in this new light in which we see the world around us, I feel alone. Sometimes lonely, but forever alone. It's not the angst-y type of Alone that I used to hang so tightly to, not the me-against-the-world kind of Alone. More of an "I am Alone", the world goes on around me and it is up to me to choose where I go. People and other beings, they are all natural. And neutral. Natural and neutral. Neutral and natural. I may not know what drives them, but I sure can guess, I may not be able to control them, but I can control myself.
Enough of me, back to you. How will we be as friends? Tried talking to you so we could decide today... But well, Time permits us not to. Or maybe not. So let us try now.
No. No. No. I am still growing to understand my emotions. Hell, what was I feeling earlier today? Bad, oppression, His Gaze, His Words, I Shiver and irrational emotions overwhelm me once more.
Friday, October 12, 2012
A Scorpion Moment
There was this Hindu who saw a scorpion floundering around in the water.
He decided to save it by stretching out his finger,
but the scorpion stung him.
The man still tried to get the scorpion out of the water,
but the scorpion stung him again.
A man nearby told him to stop,
to stop saving the scorpion that kept on stinging him.
But the Hindu said:
"It is the nature of the scorpion to sting.
It is my nature to love.
Why, then,
should I give up my nature to love
just because it is the nature of the scorpion to sting?
Adapted from InspirationalStories.com
How true indeed, why should we lose our good nature just due to the bad of others?
A true story by Kent Nerburn: The Last Cab Ride
Twenty years ago, I drove a cab for a living. One time I arrived in the middle of the night for a pick up at a building that was dark except for a single light in a ground floor window.
Under these circumstances, many drivers would just honk once or twice, wait a minute, then drive away. But I had seen too many impoverished people who depended on taxis as their only means of transportation. Unless a situation smelled of danger, I always went to the door. This passenger might be someone who needs my assistance, I reasoned to myself. So I walked to the door and knocked.
“Just a minute,” answered a frail, elderly voice.
I could hear something being dragged across the floor. After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 80′s stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940s movie. By her side was a small nylon suitcase.
The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets. There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware.
“Would you carry my bag out to the car?” she said. I took the suitcase to the cab, then returned to assist the woman. She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb. She kept thanking me for my kindness.
“It’s nothing,” I told her. “I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother treated.”
“Oh, you’re such a good boy,” she said. When we got in the cab, she gave me an address, then asked, “Could you drive through downtown?”
“It’s not the shortest way,” I answered quickly.
“Oh, I don’t mind,” she said. “I’m in no hurry. I’m on my way to a hospice.”
I looked in the rear view mirror. Her eyes were glistening.
“I don’t have any family left,” she continued. “The doctor says I don’t have very long.”
I quietly reached over and shut off the meter. “What route would you like me to take?” I asked.
For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator. We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds. She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl.
Sometimes she’d ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing.
As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said, “I’m tired. Let’s go now.”
We drove in silence to the address she had given me.
It was a low building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico. Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move. They must have been expecting her. I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. The woman was already seated in a wheelchair.
“How much do I owe you?” she asked, reaching into her purse.
“Nothing,” I said.
“You have to make a living,” she answered.
“There are other passengers.”
Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. She held onto me tightly.
“You gave an old woman a little moment of joy,” she said. “Thank you.”
I squeezed her hand, then walked into the dim morning light. Behind me, a door shut. It was the sound of the closing of a life.
I didn’t pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly, lost in thought. For the rest of that day, I could hardly talk. What if that woman had gotten an angry driver, or one who was impatient to end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven away? On a quick review, I don’t think that I have done anything more important in my life. We’re conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments. But great moments often catch us unaware—beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.
I love this story. It reminds me that everyone has their own story behind them, it reminds me not to judge others, to treat others with compassion and care... For many a times, our society hardens hearts into ice, and all it takes is a little love to melt them down just that little bit.
Thursday, October 11, 2012
A Letter from Paulo Coelho
I remember receiving a letter from the American
publisher, HarperCollins, which said that "reading The Alchemist was
like getting up at dawn and seeing the sun rise while the rest of the world
still slept." I went outside, looked up at the sky and thought to myself,
"So, the book is going to be translated!" At the time, I was
struggling to establish myself as a writer and to follow my path, despite all the
voices telling me it was impossible.
And little by little, my dream was becoming reality. Ten,
a hundred, a thousand, a million copies were sold in America. One day, a
Brazilian journalist phoned to say that President Clinton had been photographed
reading the book. Some time later, when I was in Turkey, I opened the
magazine Vanity Fair and there was Julia Roberts, declaring
that she adored the book. Walking alone down a street in Miami, I heard a girl
telling her mother, "You must read The Alchemist!"
The book has been translated into 61 languages, has sold
more than 30 million copies worldwide, and people are beginning to ask:
"What's the secret behind such a huge success?" The only honest
response is that I don't know. All I know is that, like Santiago the shepherd
boy, we all need to be aware of our personal calling.
What is a personal calling? It is God's blessing, it is
the path that God chose for you here on Earth. Whenever we do something that
fills us with enthusiasm, we are following our legend. However, we don't all
have the courage to confront our dreams.Why?
There are four obstacles. First, we are told from
childhood onwards that everything we want to do is impossible. We grow up with
this idea, and as the years accumulate, so too do the later of prejudice, fear
and guilt. There comes a time when our personal calling is so deeply buried in
our soul as to be invisible. But it's still there.
If we
have the courage to disinter our dream, we are then faced by the second
obstacle: love. We know what we want to do, but are afraid of hurting those
around us by abandoning everything in order to pursue our dream. We do not
realize that love is just a further impetus, not something that will prevent us
going forwards, and that those who genuinely wish us well want us to be happy
and are prepared to accompany us on that journey.
Once we have accepted that love is a stimulus, we come up
against the third obstacle: fear of the defeats we will meet on the path. We
who fight for our dream suffer far more when it doesn't work out, because we
cannot fall back on the old excuse, "Oh, well, I didn't really want it
anyway." We do want it and know that we have staked everything on it and
that the path of the personal calling is no easier than any other path, except
that our whole heart is in this journey. Then we warriors of light must be
prepared to have patience in difficult times and to know that the Universe is
conspiring in our favor, even though we may not understand how.
I ask
myself: are defeats necessary? Well, necessary or not, they happen. When we
first begin fighting for our dream, we have no experience and make many
mistakes. The secret of life, though, is to fall seven times and to get up
eight times.
So, why is it so important to live our personal calling
if we are only going to suffer more than other people? Because once we have
overcome the defeats - and we always do- we are filled with a greater sense of
euphoria and confidence. In the silence of our hearts, we know that we are
proving ourselves worthy of the miracle of life. Each day, each hour, is part
of the good fight. We start to live with enthusiasm and pleasure. Intense,
unexpected suffering passes more quickly than suffering that is apparently
bearable; the latter goes on for years and, without our noticing, eats away at
our soul, until, one day, we are no longer able to free ourselves from the
bitterness and it stays with us for the rest of our lives.
Having disinterred our dream, having used the power of
love to nurture it and spent many years living with the scars, we suddenly
notice that what we always wanted is there, waiting for us, perhaps the very
next day. Then comes the fourth obstacle: the fear of realizing the dream for
which we have been fighting all our lives.
Oscar
Wilde said, "Each man kills the thing he loves." And it's true. The
mere possibility of getting what we want fills the soul of the ordinary person
with guilt. We look around at all those who have failed to get what they want
and feel that we do not deserve to get what we want either. We forget about all
the obstacles we overcame, all the suffering we endured, all the things we had
to give up in order to get this far. I have known a lot of people who, when
their personal calling was within their grasp, went on to commit a series of
stupid mistakes and never reached their goal when it was only a step away.
This is the most dangerous of the obstacles because it
has a kind of saintly aura about it: renouncing joy and conquest. But if you
believe yourself worthy of the thing you fought so hard to get, then you become
an instrument of God, you help the Soul of the World, and you understand why
you are here.
Translated by Margaret Jull Costa
Ego
I really couldn't believe the sight I saw
A room of solitude and companionship, of peace and music
Destroyed in an instance
"Everyone, be slaves to your Ego!"
And slaves they did become,
Shouts, plucks, crashes and rings
Conversation, strums, beats and hammer
And no one cared for the mess they made
no one cared that no one cared
Not even one.
No one.
No one.
None.
So Indulge Me,
for I am
Ego
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Roma Sogna
E roma sogna sotto la luna
Che costa poco la felicità
Una moneta nella fontana
Ed il sogno diventa realtà
Una moneta nella fontana
Ed il sogno diventa realtà
-Roma Sogna-
*Sigh*
Monday, October 8, 2012
One Final Effort
Last push. Hobey-ho! Let's go!
(I love this song, though I never played Halo like properly before xD)
Friday, October 5, 2012
Hands
Sometimes, I wish my hands were small.
For what a world of difference that would be–
I’d possess a delicacy and precision I will never have;
I could paint the stripes inside a flower,
The claws on a mouse;
The fragility of a spider’s gossamer web
My own hand could stitch.
I’d notice the finest details of the most minuscule things.
And see beauty where the eyes of others cannot.
I’d touch the tears at the ends of eyelashes, withheld, disallowed–
And draw them away,
And show that they are beautiful.
And catch the light ends of flyaway dreams
And tie them back to the minds they came from.
I’d tug the fraying seams of drifting, broken hearts,
And weave them back to wholeness.
I’d heal the world from the inside out,
Little, by little, by little.
Sometimes, I wish my hands were very, very small.
-Sorcha-
陶喆:太美丽
每一滴眼泪 每一次心碎
什么爱能无疚无悔
不灰心等待 痛苦也忍耐
你坚持爱了就不后退
我知道我不是一个轻易就会说爱的人
没有想到这样的你 却改变了我
太美丽 太美丽
你的爱是多么的甜密
太美丽 爱让我也美丽
现在我不再怀疑
我不怀疑有多爱你
每一个脚印 每一朵乌云
说着我的飘忽不定
伤你伤好深 别人早就要放弃
为何你还是会给我宽容
我知道我不是一个轻易就会说爱的人
可是你坚强的付出 却改变我
太美丽 太美丽
你的爱是多么的甜密
太美丽 爱让我也美丽
现在你不必再去怀疑
当你在风雨的未知里走过
当我在迷失的自我的漩涡
交会在黑暗中 你我发出了新的光芒
现在我已全明白
什么是爱的真意
太美丽 太美丽
你的爱让生命太甜密
太美丽 只有为你感激
越过表面我看见你
美丽的心
最美丽
你太美丽
你最美丽
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
Company
Company should not be a pastime,
Neither should it be a form of denial
Company ought to be a sharing of love
A sharing of stories, of love, of sincerity
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Iridescent
You were standing in the wake of devastation
You were waiting on the edge of the unknown
With the cataclysm raining down, insides crying save me now
You were there and possibly alone~~~
Do you feel cold and lost in desperation
You build up hope, but failure's all you've known
Remember all the sadness and frustration
And let it go, let it go...
And in a burst of light that blinded every angel
As if the sky had blown the heavens into stars
You felt the gravity of tempered grace falling into empty space
No one there to catch you in their arms~~~
Do you feel cold and lost in desperation
You build up hope, but failure's all you've known
Remember all the sadness and frustration
And let it go, let it go~~~
Do you feel cold and lost in desperation
You build up hope, but failure's all you've known
Remember all the sadness and frustration
And let it go, let it go
Let it go
Let it go
Let it go
Let it go
Do you feel cold and lost in desperation
You build up hope, but failure's all you've known
Remember all the sadness and frustration
And let it go, let it go~~~
Saturday, September 29, 2012
All I Really Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten
IN THE SOLOMON ISLANDS IN THE SOUTH PACIFIC some villagers practice a unique form of logging. If a tree is too large to be felled with an ax, the natives cut it down by yelling at it. (Can't lay my hands on the article, but I swear I read it). Woodsmen with special powers creep up on a tree just at dawn and suddenly scream at the top of their lungs. They continue this for thirty days. The tree dies and falls over. The theory is that the hollering kills the spirit of the tree. According to the villagers, it always works.
Ah, those poor naive innocents. Such quaintly charming habits of the jungle. Screaming at trees, indeed. How primitive. Too bad they don't have the advantages of modern technology and the scientific mind.
Me? I yell at my wife. And yell at the telephone and the lawn mower. And yell at the TV and the newspaper and my children. I've ever been known to shake my fist and yell at the sky at times.
Man next door yells at his car a lot. And this summer I heard him yell at a stepladder for most of an afternoon. We modern, urban, educated folks yell at traffic and umpires and bills and banks and machines - especially machines. Machines and relatives get most of the yelling.
Don't know what good it does. Machines and things just sit there. Even kicking doesn't always help. As for people, well, the Solomon Islanders may have a point. Yelling at living things does tend to kill the spirit in them. Sticks and stones may break our bones, but words will break our hearts.
-Robert Fulghum-
Tuesday, September 25, 2012
HELL YEA
"For those who believe in God, most of the big questions are answered. But for those of us who can't readily accept the God formula, the big answers don't remain stone-written. We adjust to new conditions and discoveries. We are pliable. Love need not be a command nor faith a dictum. I am my own god. We are here to unlearn the teachings of the church, state, and our educational system. We are here to drink beer. We are here to kill war. We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that Death will tremble to take us."
I believe in God though, though not the Church xD
I believe in God though, though not the Church xD
Saturday, September 22, 2012
Thursday, September 20, 2012
Bolster, verb
"I am very careful whenever I know you’re on the phone with your father. I know you’ll come to me eventually, and we’ll talk you through it. But I have to wait — you need your time. In the meantime, I’m careful what songs I play. I try to speak to you with my selections."
-The Lover's Dictionary"
BEARGH
Saw this picture last night on tumblr. It's motivational. It's inspiring. But I must disagree to this s***. If you need to move on a bicycle to keep your balance, what does it show? It shows you don't know how to ride a bicycle well. Same with life. If you have to keep moving to keep your balance in life. there's something wrong. fundamentally wrong. and no shit's gonna save you, and all that's gonna happen is that you're going to keep moving faster and faster. and soon, you'll crash. you'll burn. Stop when you still can and fix the problems.
Face them. Don't just ride on.
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Eulogy
Tonight, I stood among the ashes of so many people who are no longer with us, and the body of one, and the hearts of many who still are. Each one of these many people carry with them a story. A story which brought them here. So many different stories all coming together to conclude the story of one. And how many more stories which failed to be brought here, so many different stories going away not to conclude this one.
Okay, I am not making sense now. Good night blog.
Okay, I am not making sense now. Good night blog.
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
The Gauntlet
Well I just got back from a break in the fight
I was weighing in heavy but still feeling alright
all I hear in the distance - mines and shells
here come the sirens wailing another attack to be repelled
Do you think we're gonna make it?
I don't know unless we try
you could sit here scared to move
or we could take them by surprise
it's submission that they want
it's surrender that they need
when we're doing it their way
their aims will be achieved
They're gonna come when you're not ready
when you're not too well-prepared
they're gonna prey upon your weakness
no man's soul is ever spared
you've got to stand up, yeah, and fight them
show them what it's all about
this man is not for sale
there will be no backing down.
[Chorus:]
Stand up and fight and I'll stand up with you
We shall succeed,
Stand up and fight and I'll stand up with you
They won't get me, they won't get me
though they never cease to try
they won't get me, they won't get me
I would rather fight and die
they won't get me, they won't get me
well my friend will they get you?
when they get you, when they get you
tell me what you're gonna do?
Do you think we're gonna make it?
I don't know unless we try
you could sit here scared to move
or we could take them by surprise
it's submission that they want
it's surrender that they need
when we're doing it their way
their aims will be achieved.
They're gonna come when you're not ready
when you're not too well-prepared
they're gonna prey upon your weakness
no man's soul is ever spared
you've got to stand up, yeah, and fight them
show them what it's all about
this man is not for sale
there will be no backing down.
[Chorus: x2]
Stand up and fight and I'll stand up with you
We shall succeed
Stand up and fight and I'll stand up with you
STAND UP AND FIGHT!
I was weighing in heavy but still feeling alright
all I hear in the distance - mines and shells
here come the sirens wailing another attack to be repelled
Do you think we're gonna make it?
I don't know unless we try
you could sit here scared to move
or we could take them by surprise
it's submission that they want
it's surrender that they need
when we're doing it their way
their aims will be achieved
They're gonna come when you're not ready
when you're not too well-prepared
they're gonna prey upon your weakness
no man's soul is ever spared
you've got to stand up, yeah, and fight them
show them what it's all about
this man is not for sale
there will be no backing down.
[Chorus:]
Stand up and fight and I'll stand up with you
We shall succeed,
Stand up and fight and I'll stand up with you
They won't get me, they won't get me
though they never cease to try
they won't get me, they won't get me
I would rather fight and die
they won't get me, they won't get me
well my friend will they get you?
when they get you, when they get you
tell me what you're gonna do?
Do you think we're gonna make it?
I don't know unless we try
you could sit here scared to move
or we could take them by surprise
it's submission that they want
it's surrender that they need
when we're doing it their way
their aims will be achieved.
They're gonna come when you're not ready
when you're not too well-prepared
they're gonna prey upon your weakness
no man's soul is ever spared
you've got to stand up, yeah, and fight them
show them what it's all about
this man is not for sale
there will be no backing down.
[Chorus: x2]
Stand up and fight and I'll stand up with you
We shall succeed
Stand up and fight and I'll stand up with you
STAND UP AND FIGHT!
HAHA
You know what is irrational? It's how happy I feel watching you sleep right there where you're sleeping xD It's so weird, I find it cute, and I'm really happy to see you there xD
Saturday, September 15, 2012
Memories of the young me
The hippocampus is a brain structure thought to be crucially involved in the formation of memory for facts and events. At birth and in early childhood this structure is not fully grown, and so memory of birth is unlikely. What's interesting is that the brain structure for emotional memory, the amygdala, is mature in infancy - the outcome of these two facts being that an emotionally significant event during infancy may affect the way a child behaves later in life despite them not being able to remember the actual event.
-David Sant, Oxford-
In other words, many times, remembering an incidence when one is very young, very small still, would result in being fully able to relive the entire emotional feeling, yet not remembering what caused it. Or only fragments of it.
Names
Aella
"Whirlwind", "speed"
Athena
Wisdom (Greek Origin)
Emer
Swift (Gaelic Origin from eimh "swift")
Shannon
Wisdom (Gaelic Origin from sean "old,wise" abhann "river"
"Whirlwind", "speed"
Athena
Wisdom (Greek Origin)
Emer
Swift (Gaelic Origin from eimh "swift")
Shannon
Wisdom (Gaelic Origin from sean "old,wise" abhann "river"
Happy Birthday
Hey...
Happy 17th Birthday... I don't know if I should directly wish you... And thus (this). This is the 4th year which I'm wishing you "Happy Birthday" and the context for every year has changed so much... I hope I'll keep wishing you "Happy Birthday" for years to come :)
All the best!
Happy 17th Birthday... I don't know if I should directly wish you... And thus (this). This is the 4th year which I'm wishing you "Happy Birthday" and the context for every year has changed so much... I hope I'll keep wishing you "Happy Birthday" for years to come :)
All the best!
Friday, September 14, 2012
Confidence
Someone just douche-bag-ly said that I had to be more confident in myself (well, not toooo douche-bag-ly, but in a very rough and straight in the face way) and he mentioned too that it's very easy for one to do so, that it is merely a change of mindset (or something along those lines...) butbutbutbut... I must disagree... Sure, one can restart life anew with confidence, but doing so is wrong, and stupid. One has lived a life of however long one has lived, and to ignore everything, throwing away all the experiences that one has lived through, it simply feels very wasted and unauthentic.
One must analyse their own lives, their stories, to find out why they lost their confidence and only then, one can fully heal from it.
And I guess that's what I should try to do.
It's not about denial, it's not about reinventing yourself, it's about embracing who you are and what made you so, embracing both the past & present.
One must analyse their own lives, their stories, to find out why they lost their confidence and only then, one can fully heal from it.
And I guess that's what I should try to do.
It's not about denial, it's not about reinventing yourself, it's about embracing who you are and what made you so, embracing both the past & present.
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
Kiss From A Rose
"To me you're like a grown addiction that I can't deny, won't you tell me is that healthy, baby?"
我实在太依赖这你了。不只是胸怀、不只是神志,甚至肌肉、骨头也好难受。我猜得对吧:这瘾的确是个错误。
How much easier would it have been if I did nothing.
我实在太依赖这你了。不只是胸怀、不只是神志,甚至肌肉、骨头也好难受。我猜得对吧:这瘾的确是个错误。
Saturday, September 8, 2012
BLOG IM SO SORRYYYYYY!!!!
Okay, firstly, I did not keep to my 1 word a day for 20 days thing. D:
Secondly, my last few posts have been 1 liners....
I think I have to explain myself:
Firstly, I am very caught up with many things in life!
1. SolidWorks!
I need to learn how to use SolidWorks ASAP if not DCARP is screwed!!!!
2. AgNP ARP
We're revving up and going onto the next phase of experimentations! Need to be much more careful and cautious. Not to mention I need to put much more thought into that now that we're progressing into light irradiation!
3. Korra
Yes I know this is not work! But come on! The Adventures of Korra, the sequel to The Adventures of Aang (Yes, I love Nick's Avatar series!) has book 1 totally out and I just finished watching the whole thing. Doesn't help that I'm now totally waiting for book 2 to be out! I really love how even despite the fact that this whole show is merely cartoon and all, the character development for most of the characters in Aang were very well done! Although this is currently lacking in Korra, we gotto cut some slack! We're only a quarter our way through Korra for now! AND I LOVE NAGA!!! AND TENZIN'S KIDS ARE SOOOO CUUTTEEEE especially Meelo! HAHAHAHA!
*On a side note, did i ever mention how i rather the old kind of cartoon instead of the newer "realistic" CGI stuff ><
4. StarCraft
I'm back to starcraft! Just finished watching 2 live matches between a friend and an online competitor! ZvZ matches! Both were so intense like crazy! Gotto watch the replay and learn how these boys played the matches! it's a whole notch above how i'm playing D:
andandand... WORK >< hai....
Secondly, my last few posts have been 1 liners....
I think I have to explain myself:
Firstly, I am very caught up with many things in life!
1. SolidWorks!
I need to learn how to use SolidWorks ASAP if not DCARP is screwed!!!!
2. AgNP ARP
We're revving up and going onto the next phase of experimentations! Need to be much more careful and cautious. Not to mention I need to put much more thought into that now that we're progressing into light irradiation!
3. Korra
Yes I know this is not work! But come on! The Adventures of Korra, the sequel to The Adventures of Aang (Yes, I love Nick's Avatar series!) has book 1 totally out and I just finished watching the whole thing. Doesn't help that I'm now totally waiting for book 2 to be out! I really love how even despite the fact that this whole show is merely cartoon and all, the character development for most of the characters in Aang were very well done! Although this is currently lacking in Korra, we gotto cut some slack! We're only a quarter our way through Korra for now! AND I LOVE NAGA!!! AND TENZIN'S KIDS ARE SOOOO CUUTTEEEE especially Meelo! HAHAHAHA!
*On a side note, did i ever mention how i rather the old kind of cartoon instead of the newer "realistic" CGI stuff ><
4. StarCraft
I'm back to starcraft! Just finished watching 2 live matches between a friend and an online competitor! ZvZ matches! Both were so intense like crazy! Gotto watch the replay and learn how these boys played the matches! it's a whole notch above how i'm playing D:
andandand... WORK >< hai....
Friday, September 7, 2012
Talking (2)
"It's okay to be scared. The important thing is to talk about our fears. Because if we don't, they can throw us off balance."
-Tenzin-
"Admitting your fears is the first and most difficult step in overcoming them"
-Tenzin-
"Admitting your fears is the first and most difficult step in overcoming them"
Friday, August 31, 2012
Cloud
I'm in a cloud of sorts now. My thoughts are all dispersed so much around in my mindscape, just so... ethereal. And the cloud doesn't look good. I guess since I can't really see this imaginary cloud of mine, I should say "It doesn't feel good". But "look" seems to resonate with what I'm feeling more. Something's wrong in the cloud. But it's all mist. Sure, I can just push it all aside and live on with life. But is that the right thing to do?
There's something toxic in the cloud. And it's eating me, slowly, somehow. Yet there's nothing I can do now. It's pretty thick. And from in there, all the cloud's done is to irrationalize.
There's nothing bothering me. Nothing concrete. Yet deep down, something is. Irrational.
There's something toxic in the cloud. And it's eating me, slowly, somehow. Yet there's nothing I can do now. It's pretty thick. And from in there, all the cloud's done is to irrationalize.
There's nothing bothering me. Nothing concrete. Yet deep down, something is. Irrational.
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
Stay
Stay here. Don't leave.
Stay here. Don't leave. 2 statements of desire. Desire of companionship. A direct request of physical companionship.
Only because of an implicit emotional attachment, lives intertwined. I guess I am learning, learning to let people go. Doesn't mean it's easy. Not at all.
Stay here. Don't leave. 2 statements of desire. Desire of companionship. A direct request of physical companionship.
Only because of an implicit emotional attachment, lives intertwined. I guess I am learning, learning to let people go. Doesn't mean it's easy. Not at all.
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
I Want It All
Talking
How much does talking change the thoughts and views of people? Sure does a lot. Words. What's so powerful about sound? Sure, it's energy. But with so much less raw power as compared to other forms of energy. The power of words transcends the physical. Words hit hard to the mind, the soul, the heart.
Sure took very long, but LD has changed his perception of the results for the election. No overriding to be done now. But that is, for now. What happened? It's not my words which changed anything. Neither is it the elder captain. Nor the current one to keep the record straight and clean. It's an outsider. The well-said words of an outsider.
Those well-said words. How did they affect me? The fire in me is quenched. What if LD and the outsider had done this all on purpose. The whole set-up. Just something to silent the desires and thoughts of mine. A cacophony of words. A cacophony of words made to dance through the defenses and rigors of my mind. Not words hitting hard. But words slipping.
If I did not realize the possibility of this "discordant mixture of sounds" being not so random, carefully planned and directed. Would I just bounce on along with life feeling satisfied? Would that be better?
I do realize this possibility, though. Is this, too, carefully planned and directed? Maybe to confuse me and put me off guard? To shake my attention from the tasks at hand?
Talking. Thinking. These words hold much more meaning than words can place. Or maybe, it's just me. Too ill-skilled to use my talking to affect the thinking of others. My words unable to capture my thoughts. Unable to capture the conversations running and dancing in this mindscape of mine.
If words can wield so much power, how much more can actions wield?
Sure took very long, but LD has changed his perception of the results for the election. No overriding to be done now. But that is, for now. What happened? It's not my words which changed anything. Neither is it the elder captain. Nor the current one to keep the record straight and clean. It's an outsider. The well-said words of an outsider.
Those well-said words. How did they affect me? The fire in me is quenched. What if LD and the outsider had done this all on purpose. The whole set-up. Just something to silent the desires and thoughts of mine. A cacophony of words. A cacophony of words made to dance through the defenses and rigors of my mind. Not words hitting hard. But words slipping.
If I did not realize the possibility of this "discordant mixture of sounds" being not so random, carefully planned and directed. Would I just bounce on along with life feeling satisfied? Would that be better?
I do realize this possibility, though. Is this, too, carefully planned and directed? Maybe to confuse me and put me off guard? To shake my attention from the tasks at hand?
Talking. Thinking. These words hold much more meaning than words can place. Or maybe, it's just me. Too ill-skilled to use my talking to affect the thinking of others. My words unable to capture my thoughts. Unable to capture the conversations running and dancing in this mindscape of mine.
If words can wield so much power, how much more can actions wield?
Judge
Which mortal man has the right to judge? No man is given the power to judge. Only the entirety of mankind can hold judgement against one man. The formation of the social contract, gives the right to society to judge upon a man. But yet once more, what if one chooses not to partake in this contract? What then? How then? It would no longer be right. It will be ruthless. But it will still be done. Necessary. Or so they claim
Monday, August 27, 2012
Random Word List
Here's a list of random words from http://watchout4snakes.com/creativitytools/randomword/randomwordplus.aspx
1. Intake
2. Commodity
3. Lock
4. Craft
5. Surprise
6. Stay
7. Girlfriend
8. Cloud
9. Smoking
10. Flood
11. Sacking
12. Boiling
13. Judge
14. Talking
15. Cue
16. Angelic
17. Giddier
18. Hottest
19. Ethically
20. Expressly
You may wonder what in the world I'm doing! Well, I have decided that for the next 20 days, i shall post about one of these words in the list! Hope it runs well and interesting! xD
1. Intake
2. Commodity
3. Lock
4. Craft
5. Surprise
6. Stay
7. Girlfriend
8. Cloud
9. Smoking
10. Flood
11. Sacking
12. Boiling
13. Judge
14. Talking
15. Cue
16. Angelic
17. Giddier
18. Hottest
19. Ethically
20. Expressly
You may wonder what in the world I'm doing! Well, I have decided that for the next 20 days, i shall post about one of these words in the list! Hope it runs well and interesting! xD
Worthy
Worthy adj.
1. Deserving effort, attention or respect.
Am I worthy of you? Am I worthy of all these roles I have been given, or born to? Am I worthy of my birthright? Or am I only worthy of doubts? Doubts which incapacitate men.
1. Deserving effort, attention or respect.
Am I worthy of you? Am I worthy of all these roles I have been given, or born to? Am I worthy of my birthright? Or am I only worthy of doubts? Doubts which incapacitate men.
Sunday, August 26, 2012
A Wonderful Jewel
An iridescence beyond compare, dazzling from the brightest hues of yellow to the coldest shades of black onyx. This wonderful jewel, which dances in all its vivid colors above us, yet we do not see. But if time were to dash, to make the sky as beautifully radiant as it can be, would our lives be nothing but insignificant compared to welkin?
Maybe that's it. The passing of thyme in our relative is simply a crawl, but thyme was meant to run, and in its running, the heavens shall dance in its full glory, in different to the runnings of the seeds of Gaia.
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Wants
- fire...
- & Good company
- Pretty much thats all...
